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Friday, 14 June 2013

An Open letter to my dad



Dear Daddy

I know you and I had our fair stake of disputes some more hurting than others, But  hey we also had our rational share of Joy, for years I detained so much resentment towards you that even I couldn’t grasp, I was young and fragile, and you were according to me very insensitive. I never took a moment to try and understand what you could be going through, I mean I was your first daughter and it must have been hard. I anticipated a lot from you, I guess I was selfish


I look back over my life and realize all you ever wanted was what’s best for me, you wanted me to attain what you and mom couldn’t attain for us. You wanted me to never lose sight of whats more important

To be honest, then I thought u just wanted to make my life miserable. How u didn’t want me to have a bunch of friends, how u didn’t see it necessary that I have expensive clothes. But every time we needed a new book at school or a calculator you didn’t hesitate to get it for me, when everyone thought I was a snob and loved speaking English, you encouraged that I do.Guess you knew i might end up in Sandton

I’m sorry I overlooked all this over the years because I was too busy concentrating on you imperfections. I wish I gave you a chance. I know u tried to reach out 
I remember one day I was angry because I thought nobody cared about me. My mother told you I was crying and you didn’t say anything instead you just left. I thought to myself indeed nobody cares

Later that afternoon you bought me a present, it was in a plastic bag,You bought me an “angel” it was really pretty and you said every time I feel a little down I should look at it and know someone cares, you said when David was feeling done he would play his instrument and will soon be okay

Ungrateful as I was I took it, didn’t say anything and put it In the drawer still in the plastic bag, I thought to myself, he didn’t even wrap it, who does that? Now I have an answer for that, a good father who cares so much about her daughter but just doesn’t know how to express himself. I expected too much from you, I admit .I want you to know right now that I thank you for that angel and wrapped or not, it was the best gift I ever got in my entire life because it was bought with love

Daddy, you are the best. Fathers have ran away from their accountabilities some remained  but didn’t really stay. You raised us with utmost integrity and made us believe in our capabilities. They say a father’s job is to teach his children to ride horses and prepare them for war. I am the woman I am today because you made me believe I can

I remember just after my matric when everyone was excited about going to tertiary , I was  not so much excited because I knew we didn’t have the financial freedom to afford tertiary education, I thought because its three of us now , I would have to wait for my brothers to finish so they can  help me further my studies

You said I’m going to tertiary regardless and you said you’ll do whatever you can to make sure I did. Thank you for keeping your promise and for supporting me every step of the way

You played your role as a father and beyond. I am very much grateful to God for giving me a father such as you. You have a heart as huge as the ocean, dreams way bigger than you and u never give up on them. I learned to believe in myself because you believed in me. You taught me to be content and to remain happy regardless of any circumstances .Thank you!

There’s so many things I lacked growing up, and so many things I still lack ,but they are nothing compared to the love of a father I have in you. I’ve lived and allowed life to teach me things and I came to realize that a lot of women are damaged because they never had the love of a father. I’m blessed to have you and may The Good Lord grant you many more years so you can live to see the life you so wished for us manifested before your eyes. Thank you papa

I don’t need a famous, rich or super smart dad; I just need you and happy Father’s day in advance.You are a super dad :) and I LOVE YOU

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